Anxious, because

Anxious,

Because I feel like I am about to do something good,

something different,

something right… again.

Anxious,

Because I’ve been here before —

Felt like a bird finally feeling

the strong wind that would carry me home.

Anxious,

Because I felt it many times,

Trusted and followed the wind,

But ended up falling just the same.

Anxious,

Because the strong wind feels good again

And nothing good lasts for a long time

And would just wound my wings again.

Anxious,

Because I’ve been here before,

And all that didn’t kill me

Just left me in greater pain that before.

Anxious,

Because nothing makes me stronger.

Not the pain, not the failure,

Not the hard lesson learned.

Anxious,

Because I’m tired of feeling strong,

Flying just to end up hitting the bottom

As if my wings were never mine to begin with.

 –H

061517

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